The "L" word.

LACTOSE INTOLERANCE.

Most people tend to become lactose intolerant as they grow older. This is due to the body's decreased ability to break down lactose, as the body starts to produce lesser lactase, the enzyme required to break down the lactose in milk and dairy products into the simple sugars (glucose and galactose), which the body is able to absorb.

My body is now telling me that I'm OLD. That I'm old enough to become lactose intolerant. Thank you for the subtle message, my lovely body.

24 is not old.
   

It is NOT.
   

Status: ON

Defense mode has been triggered, and am now in the "avoidance" stage.

Next up will be "flight".

Well done Elise. You're doing it again.

Closed Quarters

The space in ones' head is probably the only place where silence can be obtained and where no betrayal will exist.

That is possibly true, until one loses the mind. That's when chaos reins the space and there will never be silence again.

Ever since Pine betrayed my trust, I've never trust enough again to confide my most inner thoughts to another.

When I say "I don't want to talk about it", that is as literal as it means.

Stop probing.

No matter the relation, some spaces are meant to be, and will always be, off limits.

I believe that there is a little part of everyone which they wish to remain the exclusive owner of.

And for me, the space in my head is exclusively mine.

   

Tonight...

I cried.

I cried for my inability to be there for Evee.

I miss her so.

  

Truth is...

I'm a really selfish person.

What I have at any point in time, will eventually become what I don't wish to be in possession of, and this has been a repetitive cycle.

The cycle has began, again.

Time to be a sinner, again.

 

Another one.

Some weeks back, was told that Pung went off to Sdyney for his Dental course, and saw his photos on Facebook today.

It hurts badly. It hurts so damn badly.

The familiar supermarts and the familiar sky. He's in Health Science faculty too.

So much similarities... So much hurt...

I hate feeling this way. I hate it so damn much.

I'm trying to make things work. I'm trying to find a way to make things work. There are so many things which I don't know about, and it feels as though I'm constantly feeling for a way through in the dark. Where are the adults in my life? Where are the grown-ups who are supposed to show me some guidance or give some support? Why in the world  do I always have to seek out solutions and resources on my own?

I know it helps me grow and makes me more independent, but sometimes I do wish for a shoulder to lean on, and a strong sturdy arm to hold me up when I'm tired.

I want it so bad, but I have no idea how to go about getting it. I'm stumbling in the dark and am just about exhausted.

Just have to hang in there more. One day I'll find it.

I just have to keep believing.

Faith.

Ooooommmmmmmmm.......

If trying to negotiate for a shelf space is tough, I wonder what length I'll have to go through to negotiate for a space as my "peaceful zone".

My mind is set on the space in front of the bed. I'm going to get it!

MOTIVATION!

ALL ATOMS IN THE UNIVERSAL... PLEASE VIBRATE TO MY FREQUENCY!

I think there's a theory to that... Hmm... Oh well.

=)

  

I wonder...

What kind of woman am I?
What kind of woman do I want to be?

How should I live my life?
What's my philosophy in life?

What kind of food do I want in my body?
Should I become a vegetarian?
Should I start off by being a flexitarianism?

What do I want out of life?
What do I want to do?
What is my passion?

Do I love enough?
Am I selfish?
Will I ever be happy?

Will I ever fulfill my dream?
Will I get to do what I want to do?

What am I all about?
What's my purpose for existing?

If loving means hurting?
If I'll ever be ready?

Who am I?

Who is Elise?